I know my journal is (mostly) unlocked and you're more than welcome to pop in every now and then and read things without informing me but if you're actually going to add me to your friends list (which you are allowed to do, I always welcome new friends) then please leave a message that says something along the lines of "Hi, I'm *insert name here* and I found you in *insert community/similar here*. May I add you as a friend?"

It's polite. And I'm old fashioned enough to like politeness. Do it that way and I'll more than likely friend you back!

And that way I can sort out the bots from the real folks so won't end up reporting you as a bot when you're not!

Ta!

Years ago we usd to have this tape (shows you just how long ago it was!) full of songs. I could never remember the name of the tape or anything, just two songs on it. One about Kenny the Koala Bear and one about a teddy looking at a clock that said 10 to 4. I remember part of the lyrics to Kenny and only the fact that the other one was a sad song and my Dad would always skip past it on the tape.

Anyway, I found the lyrics to these two songs!

Apparently it was a Captain Beaky tape.


Here's Kenny the Koala lyrics:

Kenny is a Koala bear
His nose is always red
Every morning he sleeps late
He can't get out of bed
And as it's always opening time
He doesn't have to wait
He has a double when he wakes
Just to put him straight
And just like every Koala bear
He doesn't walk he weaves
For his diet's alcoholic
Eucalyptus leaves

Kenny is a Koala bear
He doesn't walk he weaves
For his diet's alcoholic
Eucalyptus leaves

Once he fell out of a tree
Into a passing truck
He said that's clumsy, silly me
What bloody awful luck
Still I reckon it's a tale
I can always brag-on
I'll be the only koala bear
To end up on the wagon

Chorus and ad lib to end




And Nearly Four:

A teddy bear sits on a mattress
One glass eye and threadbare paw
Looking at a cuckoo clock
Which shows it's ten to four
Four o'clock is teddy's teatime
Lots of friends and fancy cake
Although it's only pretend eating
Oh how long ten minutes take
Shadows grow on distant hillsides
Orange sun on glassy sea
All in his amber eye reflected
And still ten minutes left 'til tea

The mattress, striped, is old and broken
Rusty springs through stuffing show
The cuckoo clock is also broken
But how's a teddy supposed to know?
Unaware he's been discarded
That this is not the nursery cot
The hills and sea just glass, old papers
On a disused rubbish plot
A telephone that no one answers
Empty tins that once held tea
The clock that still says nearly teatime
Where can all the children be?
For ages now he's lain unwanted
Saluting with his threadbare paw
He'll never know he's been abandoned
'Til the clock reads after four

Don't tell him that the clock is broken
For as long as teddy doesn't know
It'll always soon be teatime
As it was so long ago



Now I just wish I could find an MP3 of them...

We all know (well, some of you probably don't) how much I hate going home. Not only is the place boring as fuck but I have bad memories of it and whenever I'm there the fact that I'm now a grown up seems to go completely out of the window.

If any of my family, other than the youngest three and Jake, are there we end up fighting. And I don't just mean arguing I mean full on fisticuffs. But we get on absolutely fine when we're NOT at home. When I was in Cornwall this time last year I spent 2 days solid with Barney, Jake and Isaac without any arguements at all. It's just something to do with being at home.

Anyway. When I'm home I tend to get very angry and can't control my temper and I get quite depressed and spend all day in bed.

But, one of the first symptoms of this is the fact that I have quite violent dreams about my family in the week before I go home. And I mean REALLY violent. I don't know why and you'd all probably run screaming from me if I went into detail.

That's not the strange thing. I've got used to that.

The strange thing is that I had one of these dreams last night. This is strange for multiple reasons.

1. I'm not going home, my family are coming to me.
2. They're not coming for months and these dreams generally only happen just before seeing them.
3. The members of my family that are coming are the ones I like wherever and whenever I see them (my Dad and my two little brothers).
4. In this dream it was Verity that "starred". I've never had a horrible dream about Verity. I love my little sister to pieces and miss her when I don't get to see her!
5. I'm not even going to see Verity!
6. Most of these dreams take place up in my home in Orkney. This one was in my old house in Cornwall.

Strange.

Anyway, now that I've terrified you all, I'm off to Edinburgh! Bye!

My parents are actually going to come and visit St Andrews!

Well, my Dad is. And he's bringing the boys down to the Leuchar's Air Show, but it's close enough.

So, on 12th September a member of my family (other than Isaac) will be in St Andrews for longer than an hour!

Still don't think they'll come to my graduation though.

Now I've got to try and figure out how my family are going to react to the fact that there will be a BC pup they don't know about in the flat...

So this is the little bundle of fluff that Jess will be bringing to me on Monday:



Isn't he cute? Look at those freckles! He has those down his legs too, Jess calls them his "naughty spots".

( A few more )

He'll fit in here, I think.

*is excited*

Doggy diarrhia.

All over your (carpeted) bedroom floor and the dog bed and the dog crate (worked into all the fiddly bits that are hard to clean, obviously).

Although, interestingly enough, if you leave the diarrhia of a raw-fed dog to dry it goes quite powdery.

I've decided I'm going to swap Sparky for one of these BC pups. They can't be any more work than him!

I am on the internet.

In my SITTING ROOM!

And now, I'm in my bedroom!

This is awesome.

The dog sitter who looked Sparky whilst I went to London, Jess, currently has a litter of border collie pups. One of her foster females managed to sneak a quickie with one of her rescue males before she had a chance to get them fixed. And so they ended up with nine BC puppies.

She's found homes for 6 of them but, as she's being very, very picky about which homes they go to she still has three left.

And she's trying to convince me to take one.

And I am very seriously tempted.

I mean, I already have one high energy, highly intelligent dog, surely another one wouldn't be too much more work? OK, this one would be an 8 week old pup but it'll grow.

OK. Cons:

(1) Money. I'm in my overdraft anyway, can I really afford a pup? But I now have a full time job and will be working my way out of my overdraft over the summer.

(2) I now have a full time job. I can be working anything from 5 to 9 hours in the bar. I can't leave a pup for that long! But Fran will be there, she can let it out. And Trish From Upstairs would probably help too if I asked her nicely. It would just be for a little while, until he can hold it better.

(3) Rich would kill me.

(4) It would mean 3 dogs in one 2 bedroom flat from September, when Susie moves in with her dog.

Pros:

(1) If I want to get another dog (which I do) now would be a brilliant time to get one. Sparky's still young and energetic but is now well enough trained that I can concentrate on training the little one. If I wait any longer Sparky's going to turn into a grumpy old man and won't want a pup around.

(2) Having 2 dogs would mean that they could exercise and entertain each other.

(3) I've always wanted a BC at some point.

(4) Having 2 dogs isn't going to take (much) more time than one. I can feed them together, walk them together, train them together.

(5) It would be nice to actually have a puppy to raise from a puppy!

(6) It would give me dog training experience.

Aaaarrrghh!


Anyway, pictures of the pups are here: http://dundeedogtrainer.co.uk/12.html

The three still without homes are Striven, Ossian and Treig.

*wants*

Thoughts? Help me decide!

*sigh*

Someone on Gumtree is advertising Boxer x Staffy pups. And they're cute. There's one that's white with a little black patch over one eye and it's gorgeous and I want it!

*goes all fuzzy broody*

http://dundee.gumtree.com/dundee/00/41003500.html

I went into Dundee today to buy some more white shirts since I've managed to go from having 4 to having 1. Bot I didn't realise there were sales on.

So I came home with:

From Primark
4 white shirts.
4 white strap tops (also for work, so acceptable).
10 pairs of socks (stripey ones!).
A pair of really nice three-quarter length trousers.
Another pair of the black skinny jeans I bought last time.

From La Senza
2 new black bras (I need new ones, mine are getting old and don't really fit anymore since I lost weight).
2 new white bras (same as above, plus I need white bras for work as my black ones show through my shirts).

From New Look
A new bikini (my old one is falling apart).

Hmm, slightly more than the white shirts I meant to buy... But I have good reasons for (most of) it! And it was cheap as it was all from Primark or in the sales. And I got paid today so it's OK...

Can you tell I'm trying to justify this to myself?


In other news: I'd really like to see Allan (supervisor at the Whey Pat) work a busy night in the Union. He was panicking last night when there were about three groups of people at the bar and only 2 of us on! Oh no! OK, to be fair, it takes longer to serve people in the Whey Pat because it's mainly Real Ale vs. manily spirit/mixer in the union, but still, it wasn't busy.

I'm also trying to organise a social dog walking group in St Andrews. When I dropped Sparky off with the dog sitter in Dundee before I went to London we went on the one she organises every Wednesday, and Sparky loved it! I can't afford to travel to Dundee and back every Wednesday so I'm trying to organise one here instead. I've made some notices to stick up in the vets and the Pet Shop, so we'll see what happens. Hopefully I can make Sparky some new doggy friends!

And it's the Race For Life on Sunday! If you feel like it my sponsorship page is here. Don't feel like you have to though!

I had a brain dead night at work.

I kept putting things through the till wrong.

I knocked a glass off a shelf.

I brought through too much/not enough stock at stocking up time.

I even poured a pint of one ale, left it to settle and topped it up with another!

Ugh.

Dave's going to be wishing he hadn't hired me.

...and rescued a parrot from a tree!

I was just leaving the flat to come to the library and walked past a lady shouting "Jimmy! Here Jim you naughty boy!" into a tree. When I stopped she looked a little embarrassed and said "It's my parrot, he flew off the veranda and into the tree."

Apparently she'd had him out on the balcony (-10 points for having a parrot outside) whilst she was cleaning and had dropped the mop, which scared him and he'd flown off into the tree on the other side of the square.

Anyway, she couldn't see him but I soon spotted a cockatoo up near the top. She started calling to him and climbed up onto the 2ft wall next to the tree but couldn't reach him. He was obviously scared and was shuffling sideways up and down the branch he was on but he wouldn't get off it and come to her.

The lady being, um, a larger lady couldn't get any higher (she'd had trouble getting onto the wall). So I asked whether he'd come to me, I know some parrots are one-person birds.

Turns out Jimmy isn't though.

So I climbed up onto the wall and up into the crook of the tree and could just reach his branch from there. Jim shuffled towards me, held his head down for scritches then slowly put one foot on my hand followed very carefully by the other.

And I carefully and slowly (so as not to scare him again) reached down to his owner who scooped him up to her chest and started going "Oh Jimmy! You're such a bad boy! Mummy was worried about you! Bad Jimmy!" Whilst snuggling him.

Then she thanked me lots and lots and I got a quick stroke of Jimmy before she hurried him home.

I bet not everyone can say they've rescued a cockatoo from a tree!

I came home from work at almost 3 this morning. I walked into the flat and pushed the door loosely closed behind me. Walked into my bedroom and let Sparky out of his crate.

As we walked back to the door to let Sparky out into the garden a black and white streak shot out of the sitting room, skittered over the hallway and out of the front door.

Once I recovered from jumping a mile in the air I figured out it was Topsy, the cat from upstairs. She must have come in through my open front door in the 30 seconds it takes me to pop into my room and open Sparky's crate.

I was realy surprised actually. She's terrified of Sparky and won't come anywhere near the garden anymore, I really didn't expect her to come into the flat!

At the end of last week and the weekend I went down to London with Rich, his brother Chris, him Mum and his friend Robbie.

Ok, lets see...

Thursday: Woke up at stupid 'o' clock in the morning in order to get through to Edinburgh in time to check in and catch the flight to London. Arrived in London in the middle of a tube strike. Luckily we knew about this before hand and so had already figured out that the easiest way to get out to the ExCeL (where our hotel was) was to get the train into the city centre (I can't remember exactly where), get on one of the Thames Clippers to Canary Wharf and then onto the DLR down to the ExCeL. We stopped off in Canary Wharf for lunch at Chillies, which was brilliant (though very salty, they pre-salt their chips and I don't like salty chips).

The DLR (Docklands Light Railway) is absolutely amazing, by the way! They're completely unmanned trains. Fully automated from one control centre. And they run like clockwork. We were only delayed twice on them, the first time because there was a problem with the power supply on one part of the track and I can't remember the reason for the second one. You can sit right up in the front of the train as well (because there's no driver) and see the tracks, it looks just like you're on a roller coaster. I loved it!

The hotel was relatively nice. Tiny rooms and twin beds rather than double (which meant Rich and I didn't share a bed :( ) but clean and nice still. Rich amused himself by checking out the titles of the "Adult" films (Titney Spheres anyone? No? How about Doctor Screw?).

Thursday night we headed over to the O2 Arena and got some food then watched Terminator Salvation (which I quite enjoyed, but I haven't seen most of the others so don't have anything to compare it to). Britney Spears was on in the main auditorium! So the place was packed with teenage girls.

Friday: Chris decided we should go to Harrods on Friday and that we should take the tube to South kensington and walk from there. He then took us in the wrong direction and spent the entire time walking off in front of us and refusing to stop and look at a map/ask someone and try and find where we were. Eventually Mum convinced him to stop for a coffee. At that point Rich, Robbie and I (who never wanted to go to Harrods in the first place) decided we were going to split off and go to Camden Market instead and that we'd meet up with the others later.

So off we went. We had a quick nosy around the market (including meeting a guy whose dog had a blue mohican, it was awesome!) and then stopped to get some food. I love the food in Camden Market!

After lunch I spotted a lovely shop called the Gothic, Lolita and Punk Club. They had an absolutely gorgeous waistcoat that laced up at both the front and the back with an attached shirt with poofy, frilly sleeves that looked stunning. Very piratey. I didn't have the money to buy it at the time (I have minus rather-a-lot of money in my bank account at the moment) but I took a note of the web address on the label so that I could check out, what I assumed to be, their online shop once I got home. Turns out it's not their online shop, it's a list of places where you can buy their stuff. The closest place is, you guessed it, Camden Market! *headdesk, sadface*

Rich then wanted to go have a look at the London Transport Museum so we went to Covent Garden. There we met Calum, Rich's drummer who currently lives in London, and his girlfriend. The transport museum was actually quite fun! They have trains and buses and things inside. Did you know that the first Underground trains were actually steam trains? Can you imagine how smoky and hot it must have been in the tunnels? They had vents leading up to the streets above to let some of it escape.

I bought a London Underground Map jigsaw Puzzle. Yes, I am that sad.

After that we met up with Chris and Mum (with Chris in a better mood). I popped into Lush to buy some hair dye (funny how I've got to go to London to get it when they sell it in Dundee). Then we went to the David and Goliath shop, where I bought this tee-shirt. I love it! I also have this one, which Rich bought for me last time he was down.

Then we went to Planet Hollywood for dinner. I can't actually remember what we did after that. Hmm... Nope, it;s gone.

Saturday: The first day of the London International Music Show in the ExCeL which is what we (well, the boys) were actually down for. Rich and Chris had tickets for the Masterclass being given by Steve Vai. So they headed straight for that when we got in at 10a.m. We arranged to meet them when it finished at 2:30. Mum, Robbie and I had a wander around the show. Mum and I collected lots and lots of free things (I'm not going to run out of pens anytime soon!) and entered a zillion-and-one prizedraws for all sorts of stuff. Robbie found the Love Of His Life, a black resonator guiter.

The I discovered that the ExCeL sells genuine Cornish Pasties! I was in heaven!

In the afternoon we watched one of the live shows, a drummer named Steve Smith, IIRC. And wandered around again with Rich and Chris.

I can't remember what we did in the evening. I can't even remember where we had dinner. I'm pretty sure this was the night that we stayed up till midnight sitting in the bar doing my jigsaw. It was hard, there's lots of plain white pieces!

Sunday: More music show. Though we spent quite a lot of it sitting outside in the sunshine rather than inside! Chris got attacked by a little Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. Not really. He's horribly allergic to dogs and this one was very insistent that it was going to sniff him. Poor Chris!

Sunday night we went to Wagamamas for dinner. I love Wagamamas! I can't actually remember what I had now, but it was amazing. Then we went for a walk around all the touristy attractions, because Robbie has never seen them. So Downing Street and Big Ben and Leicester Square and Trafalgar Square.

Rich and I made the policemen outside Downing Street laugh with this little exchange:

Me: I've been in there!
Rich: Yeah, well, I was born in the same town as the Prime Minister!
Me: Yeah, well, I've stood on the Prime Minister's doorstep!
Rich: Yeah, well, I am the Prime Minister!

Monday: We took a trip to Hamleys! It was awesome. They had a giant T-Rex made out of these little polystyrene sausages. I bought a spherical jigsaw (now my hidden fetish comes out...). We found a Pizza Hut so we could have a big buffet lunch but the pizzas tasted kinda funny and the chef was slow so there were never any on the table. So we aminly had salad, which doesn't fill you up.

Then we headed back to the hotel and collected out bags and went back to Gatwick on the train. Lots of standing in queues. Flying. Cold arrival in Scotland. Driving back to Rich's, where I slept on the sofa again and he slept in his bed upstairs because I don't sleep very well in his bed which keeps him awake and we both had to work on Tuesday morning.


All in all it was a very nice, very extended weekend. I was happy to get back to Sparky and my bunnies though!

And now I have to go because I've got to be in work in an hour and I should really have a shower first...

Well I'm back from a lovely weekend in London. More about that tomorrow, but first I need to take a trip back to before I left...

After dropping Sparky off with the dog-sitter in Dundee on Wednesday I got back about half 9 in the evening. As I came in through the front door Fran (the girl who's staying for the summer, have I introduced her yet?) left the sitting room and went into the bathroom rather quickly. The sitting room window was open and the room smelt vaguely of smoke. When Fran left the bathroom the window was open and the room smelt of smoke.

Unfortunately I was in a rush to pack and catch the last bus to St Monans at 10:45 otherwise I'd have said something then.

When I got this morning there was a definite smell of stale tobacco in the air.

Then this evening the phone rang. I answered it and it was for Fran. I went and knocked on her door. She called out "Wait a minute!" and I heard the window shutting. Then she opened the door and her room reeked of smoke.

So when she got off the phone I told her she wasn't allowed to smoke inside the flat and that I knew she'd been doing it because I could smell it. So would she smoke outside please?

She told me she "didn't know" that she wasn't allowed to smoke inside.

Bullshit.

I told her when she first came to see the flat that she would have to go outside to smoke. And if she "didn't know" then why was she blatantly trying to hide it from me?

Grr! What did I do to deserve such shitty flatmates? Maybe I'm the one who's crap...

Hopefully that's it sorted though. If she carries on smoking inside then I'll just have to charge her extra for "damages".

I had my fourth shift this morning so I thought I'd update you all about how it's going!

I've got a lot less nervous and have  relaxed a lot which has helped. It makes me more natural and more likely to chat to the customers and make jokes and such, which is what Dave (manager) wants. I was even ripping the piss out of him today! Though he was being horrible to me last night so it's only what he deserves.

I've been wearing my trousers without pockets so that I can't put my hands in them so there's been no more complaints about that! The only other thing Dave has mentioned is that I put Ice Cold Tennants in a warm glass which means it doesn't poor right (and, of course, warms up). That's mainly my (lack of) training in the union though, because we'd regularly run out of branded glasses and so if they were there you used them, whether they were warm or not.

Other than that it's been going great. I'm learning to recognise the regulars, though I can't put names to the faces yet. However, most of them are called Dave so it's not too hard! I'm serious, about 70% of the customers in the bar last night were called Dave or David!

Today I worked my first opening/lunch shift. It was quite funny. On Sundays you're not allowed to serve alcohol until 12:30 but we open at 12 for lunch. From 12 till half past there wasn't a single customer in the bar. By 25 to 1 there were 9 people in. I got free food too! For every lunch shift we work we get a free meal! I had chicken and leek pie. Yum!

I'm really starting to feel like I belong there. Last night I worked with someone other than Dave for the first time, a guy named Tony, and we got on really well. He was back in today, just as I was leaving, with his girlfriend. You know it's a good pub when the staff happily drink there.

The only complaint I have is that I was on the closing shift last night and didn't finish until 2:15am and then was back in at 11:30 this morning! I was knackered by the ime I finished at 3!

Anyway, I think I'm going to really enjoy working there. Here's to a long, healthy relationship with the Whey Pat Tavern!

Jon moved out a week ago!

I never have to see him again!

YAY!

Lets see...

Wednesday: Bop! In the union with Silvia and Owen and friends. Good fun, a few laughs, as much water as alcohol. No hangover. Happy me!

Thursday: RockSoc in the Union with Silvia and Owen and friends. Dinner in the Vic first then headed into the Union. A few more drinks and not so much water. I started jumping between the Bop! and Rocksoc towards the end of the night and at one point managed to leave my camera in RockSoc when I thought I'd bought it to the Bop! Cue major freak-out. It was the very end of the night too so I had to leave, but only after telling everyone that I'd lost my camera. I ended up having panic attacks outside Empire with a friend (Rob) trying to get me breathing again. The I got a text from Jen saying that Lizzie B had found my camera upstairs. I ran back to the union, grabbed it and went hom heppy.

Friday: My last night of work in the union. After work we headed down to West Sands for a bonfire and party. Everything was going fine and by down there were only a few of us left including (as far as I remember) Jen, Silvia and Chris M. What happened from then on is a bit blurry. I remember going for a pee and the next thing I remember was waking up with my head in Silvia's lap and not being able to breathe. According to Jen I disapeared for 45 minutes and when they found me I was collapsed and having panic attacks. I don't know what happened!

Anyway, I started throwing up and shivering and having real trouble breathing so Jen called the ambulance. Which was the right thing to do but I have a severe phobia of doctors and so the ambulance men arriving sent me into another series of panic attacks.

Eventually they breath-coached me into breathing properly again, I phoned Rich and the ambulance men drove me home. Jen stayed with me until Rich arrived and then left.

Half an hour later I couldn't breathe again and was back to shivering and shaking and having chattery teeth. So Rich got the ambulance back. They made an emergency doctor's appointment for me in the Memorial hospital and Rich drove me up. The Doc said it just seemed to be panic attacks bought on by too much alcohol and to give me something to eat, plenty to drink and take me home and put me to bed.

Saturday: I spent the day sleeping in bed. Rich took Sparky for a long walk and by the time he got back I was a lot better. So we went to see Night at the Museum 2 in Dundee.

Sunday: Started in the Whey-Pat! It seemed to go really well. Dave (manager) said that he was impressed with me despite my "lack of proper experience." The only problem he had is that I stood with my hands in my pockets a lot, but that was mainly becuase I was very nervous. It was good fun though! It's a very posh pub and there's lots of ruls that Bellhaven (who own the pub) say we have to follow. Like if someone asks for a "coke" I have to ask if they want a can or draught and then if they want ice and a slice. I don't, however, have to ask them what size they want... If someone asks for "lager" I have to ask "Tennants or Stella?" and NEVER "Stella or Tennants?" I have to hold all glasses at the bottom because the bottom is for me and the top is for the customer.

But other than all that it was good fun. I only met the two managers, Dave an Andy, last night but I've been told that all the staff are a very friendly bunch and Dave said I'd get on well with them. I have another shift on Thursday night.




I really, really don't know what happened on Friday night. I hadn't drunk that much. I know I was making no sense whilst I was in the middle of my panic attacks but as soon as I was breathing normally I was fine, talking normally, being logical, not being drunk at all. I even had intelligent conversations with one of the ambulance men about rabbits! So I don't know what bought it all on. I don't remember going missing from the bonfire either, which is weird.

I've also lost Sparky's halti and my dog-walking bag, which were on the beach when I left (Sparky came in the ambulance with me, so I didn't lose him, don't worry!). I'm hoping someone picked them up and I'll get them back.

I'm now going to go and enjoy the fact that I am having a sunny birthday! I shall take Sparky for a long walk somewhere.

I was out with Silvia, Owen and Jen last night and am doing the same again tonight. So I didn't want to be too hungove this morning. So I did the sensible thing and drank a pint of water before leaving the house, a half-pint at Silvia's, another pint in the union and again when I got home.

I was a little shaky this morning until I had yet more water and then was absolutely fine! No headache, no tiredness, no nothing.

Hey, the water thing actually works!

:D

Conversation between Rich and me yesterday afternoon.

Rich: "Will you be able to get tomorrow off work? I'd like to take you out to dinner and spend some actual time with you."
Me: "Yeah, if  get to work before Sandy does the rota."


Conversation between me and Sandy yesterday evening (after he'd done the rota).

Me: "Have you put me on for tomorrow night Sandy?"
Sandy: "Yes."
Me: " Is there anyway I can get it off. Rich wants to take me out to dinner and spend the evening with me."
Sandy: "No way. I need you in Off-Sales tomorrow. There's no-one else to do it."
Me: "OK then."


Conversation betwen me and Graeme whan I get to work tonight.

Graeme: "What are you doing here?"
Me: "Off-Sales."
Graeme: "Oh. I don't really need you. You can go home if you want to."



ARRRGGGGHHHHHH!